I’ve struggled to keep meaningful relationships with other men. Most men I’ve been close to hurt me in ways most men hurt others. I’ve always been sensitive and most men take it upon themselves to toughen people like me up. They compared me to women or gays because, to them, being female or liking men makes you weak. They laughed at me when I cried and made petty what felt monumental to me.
Category Archives: Ruminations
Baldwin’s 1962 Letter Teaching Us Today
Baldwin’s letter from 1962 could’ve been written yesterday and that’s the problem.
Brothers
I eventually learned you can choose your family. That loyalty doesn’t require blood-bonds. Love doesn’t require birthing. And, those who think they own you—whether blood or not—tend to hurt you the most. I’ve learned you can trust folks you don’t share a name with. And how some of those who do don’t deserve your time.
Fontana
The village is the reason I am a historian. It may even be the reason I am a writer. It got to a point for me where I couldn’t just visit the Smokies. I had to know more and tell others.
The Queen of North Street
We all die a little bit every day. Some people, like my grandmother, commit suicide slowly. By the time I came around she was nearly gone. My whole life she struggled to breathe. I don’t remember what I called her, but her name was Doris. Maybe I called her grandma. I never called her granny.Continue reading “The Queen of North Street”
Daisy Dukes and Combat Boots
I once hit a kid in the face with a basketball because he called my mom a bitch. I was eight. It was instinct. Later, I cried. Nowadays I’d never intentionally hurt somebody, certainly not for words, no matter how insulting. At my core, I’m not violent. When anyone argues around me a knot formsContinue reading “Daisy Dukes and Combat Boots”
Like a Frenzied Fish: A Southerner Meets Carpathia
In 2016, I had the extraordinary opportunity to travel to Romania for a joint conference between Appalachian and Carpathian scholars. The following is a telling of my journey.
My Father, the Idiot
My father passed on April 13, 2018. The first draft of this was written the night I arrived in Tampa, out of fear, anger, sadness, and confusion.
New Male, New Normal
Just like the rise of the nerds in the 90s and 00s vindicated every glasses-wearing child, the me-too movement, as an unintended and frankly unnecessary side-effect, has allowed those of us who were once taunted with feminine and queer terms of abuse to feel slightly more comfortable.
Changes
I suppose everybody lives several lives. For me, I change on a semi-annual basis. The cycle began when I was a boy. Since then I’ve wanted to be many things. After watching Michael Jackson perform, I wanted to be a singer. I watched Hee-Haw every night whilst playing my Little Tykes drum kit, dreaming of myContinue reading “Changes”
Anthony Sadler 